20 funniest tweets from parents this week

Like exhaustation. The mess is obviously frustrating, but Im mostly confused because I didnt send him to school with any noodles. My cousin had a baby and my father is giving advice on fatherhood. V punk obviously but otherwise, truly fucked me up. The Funniest Tweets From Parents This Week (Feb. 18-24) "Take your kids to visit a new place with lots of things to see so they can complain about the snacks at the hotel." By Caroline Bologna Feb 24, 2023, 12:57 PM EST | Updated Feb 26, 2023 Kids may say the darndest things, but parents tweet about them in the funniest ways. Have a good weekend everybody! Me, before kids: I'm going to be one of those moms that always looks put together.Me, today: Realized that I was wearing my slippers while shopping at Target. You are also agreeing to our Terms of Service and Privacy Policy. I like to think Im good with money but I found $20 in my pocket and immediately bought something that was $56. ", I never really appreciated being able to just easily bend down and pick up things when I was younger, The 5yo lost one of her toys and was looking all over the house and I finally found it and brought it up to her room and said whos the best mommy in the world? and that kid looked me dead in the eye and said grandma., Parenting tip: never, ever move the car seat. Wishing you all a happy and healthy weekend! Nothing is sacred. pic.twitter.com/hWtAjufSwa. 20 Funny Tweets From Women Whose Husbands Are in the Dog House, 20 Hilarious Tweets That Capture the Reality of Working in Retail or Customer Service, Top 20 Funniest Tweets From Parents This Week. Probably something gross like last time. The Charmin' Carmen (@Charmin_Carmen) January 11, 2023. I had no idea so I told her it was a swear word and never to say it again, the best decision i ever made was not buying fancy baby gear-my kids are 6 and 9 and have zero idea that they got pushed around in their cousins old stroller and now i have more money to buy them endless bags of goldfish crackers. Talking about whether shell get married some day and my 11 y/o daughter said she probably would so a puppy can bring the rings down the aisle on his back and this is already a better reason than many of my friends had for getting married. from the couch. 90% of parenting is crumb identification. Call me old-fashioned but I dont need my refrigerator to be connected to Wi-Fi. Isnt that amazing?Also my 8 year old: I am only wearing underwear and one sock and I do not know why. Kids today are able to text their moms when they need to be picked up. Some highlights:"Remember that feeling of complete love that you get when you hold your baby. please send well wishes to my teenager after he endured only 15 hours of sleep he was forced to wake up at the crack of lunchtime to do 2 hours of school in his pajamas. It was born 15 minutes ago, it looks like a potato. SANTA IS WATCHING! 25 Funny and Relatable Tweets About Raising Boys, 20 Hilarious Tweets That Capture the Reality of Working in Retail or Customer Service. I dont care anymore if hes singing Old McDonald in this Safeway. Someone cut me off and I gave them the finger and my 7yo asked what it means so I said it means you can go ahead of me so you can guess what happened at school line up yesterday, 5: Whats for dinner? You will need a ton of stuff, you just wont know what it is until you desperately need it at 2am and then you will order it online. Do you love humor and heartwarming stories? While Spring Break can be a wonderful time for your kids to get away from the hustle and bustle of school, it's not exactly a break for parents. Here are some of my favorite quips from this week. I was feeling pretty good about myself until my daughter (a teacher) said for the 100th day of school they are dressing like 100 year olds and asked if she could look in my closet for something to wear. Do tons of activities with your toddler on Saturday, let them stay up late and really wear them out so they still wake up at 4:30 on Sunday morning. I am like reeallly good at getting old. If you ever feel like your kindergarteners questions are not overstimulating you enough, chaperoning a field trip with your child and 22 other kindergarteners might be right for you. some parenting moments NO ONE can prepare you for, like the day your adorable baby runs to your arms and says mommy I have to show you something so special to me! and she leads you to the bathroom and unveils her incredibly special and disturbingly gigantic mound of poop. Thank you for following us on this journey. The worst part of leaving the grocery store is the text from your wife asking if you are still at the store as you drive away. 1. My 9YO is half way done sharing her dream which she started narrating last Monday. 2023 BuzzFeed, Inc. All rights reserved. Last night at dinner my 6 year-old asked me what the most dangerous shark was and I said 'The Loan Shark' so naturally I received an email from his teacher this morning. Kids may say the darndest things, but parents tweet about them in the funniest ways. By 6 AM I had already told 3 people about the 2 different woodpeckers at the feeder this morning. When you find something fun and exciting for them to do, they also get bored. Scroll down to read the latest batch, and follow @HuffPostParents on Twitter for more! The Funniest Tweets From Parents This Week Tory Civil War Deepens As Jake Berry Joins Growing Wind Farm Rebellion Matt Hancock Accused Of Sneaky Ploy To Win Votes From I'm A Celebrity. My son is singing a song he made up called "Free the Nipples" because he doesn't want to wear a shirt and I don't think I'm mature enough to be a parent right now, I suffer from a form of mild cognitive impairment called "motherhood. IE 11 is not supported. Its not like we pee our pants, wake up 40 times a night, wear our pajamas around all day and oh. 2023 BuzzFeed, Inc. All rights reserved. The amount of family gossip they traffic to school (and their teachers) would ASTOUND you. 5 min read. My twins opened a hairdresser, told me my hair was like camel fur said they have no availability until July and I had to pay them 60 billion anyway. Here are some of my favorite quips from this week. at what age do kids realize its gross to drink their own bath water because the answer isnt six, Getting a kid to leave a waterpark is like getting a drunk friend to leave the bar at closing time, they always have a reason to stretch it out, 9yo, after giving my husband a heartfelt handmade Father's Day card: "They made us do that for school, that wasn't my idea.". So each week, we round up the most hilarious quips from parents on . Is it leave her in the woods? Here are some of the best, funniest, and most viral tweets from this week. Part of HuffPost Parenting. My pregnant wife asked for an Oreo so I brought her a single Oreo. Wait, you might be asking yourself, are parents really funny? Just sell the vehicle. 2023 BuzzFeed, Inc. All rights reserved. So excited for my kids to go back to school and I especially like the part where they bring home a new illness for the next month. To that end, every week, we round up the most hilarious quips from parents on Twitter to spread the joy. Oldest child: Here are 100 pictures of me as a baby eating oatmeal. Not you AND your baby!" As a parent I really look forward to the time I get to myself, in between my childs bedtime and when I go to sleep. The Funniest Tweets From Parents This Week (Sept. 17-23) "Accidentally put grown-up toothpaste on my toddler's toothbrush and he screamed like I was cleaning his teeth with a Carolina Reaper dipped in Tabasco sauce." By Caroline Bologna Sep 23, 2022, 03:42 PM EDT Kids may say the darndest things, but parents tweet about them in the funniest ways. Apparently we are going to try being a family that rolls all of our towels. 8-year-old: Do you have a favorite kid?Me: That would be like you having a favorite parent.8: It's Mom. unless theres ice cream later. me: I had my first crush on a girl when I was in the first grade. ". Because shes in the livingroom. My daughter has decided she now eats dark chocolate, the one treat I never had to hide because I was the only one in the house who liked it. My 3-year-old said she wished we had a pet. Youngest child: Here are the 7 pictures of me as a child. NOBODY MOVE. Janene #1 Ouch! Part of HuffPost Parenting. Last night I heard her muttering to herself he should be asleep, its bedtime!, I live closer to my sons school now. Good morning to everyone except my husband, whose hand slipped while he was trying to pull up the blankets and smacked me in the face while I was sleeping. Here are some of the best quips I've come across this week. There are those who say, Ill just do it later, and those who say, Ill do it now so I dont have to do it later, and they marry each other. You are also agreeing to our Terms of Service and Privacy Policy. Wishing you all a good weekend! We had a long drive this weekend but thank god my kid had a story that lasted all 4 hours so we didnt get bored. Im on a business trip and I get this text from my husband, I think the kids have hidden a hotdog in the house, but I cant find it. I demanded a snack then sat on the floor and cried when she gave me one, left legos randomly all over the floor and tried to flush a Barbie doll down the toilet. She immediately said Why not 3? and honestly its a great question, will talk to my wife about it tonight. DON'T. Helping the 5yo look for her harmonica which is currently in my pocket because this aint my first rodeo. I dont know much about parenting, but I know theres a goldfish cracker under your couch right now. i forgot to set the trash can out and missed the pick up. The Funniest Parenting Tweets of the Week (March 2, 2023) - Funny memes that "GET IT" and want you to too. Allison Slater Tate is a freelance writer and editor in Florida specializing in parenting and college admissions. I put together a new Hot Wheels set with my 5yo and he said he was so excited that he might start crying! By entering your email and clicking Sign Up, you're agreeing to let us send you customized marketing messages about us and our advertising partners. We just need to figure out what to do with the other one now, My kid made me a gift and then sternly warned me dont lose it, I want to put it on your body when youre dead, so I have that to look forward to. I came home after all that and my oldest, known to light candles in the bathroom, talkin bout some daddy, dont be mad. "Take your kids to visit a new place with lots of things to see so they can complain about the snacks at the hotel. Janene #1 Similar to the "they don't make batteries for that toy anymore" trick Like obviously the answer is yes. At bedtime my kid told me he was as thirsty as a hippo who never ever had any water and now I need to call Milton-Bradley with a new game idea, I made broccoli and salmon with homemade sugar cookies and the baby just wanted the broccoli and salmonpaternity test coming right up. Me: My wife got me a telescope for Christmas.Neighbor: Nice. So each week, we round up the most hilarious quips from parents on Twitter to spread the joy. Picked up my sons from school and stopped to get gas, invited them to get out of the car and learn how to do it. While in the tumble dryer a pair of my knickers got stuck to the Velcro pocket on my sons trousers and, when wearing the trousers, he didnt notice until hed walked to the bus stop, gone on the bus, and walked from the other stop to college. Janene #1 You better believe it Birds are chirping. Top 20 Best Tweets From Funny Mom and Teacher Katie D. Top 15 Funny and Relatable Tweets From Women This Past Week, 20 Funny and Relatable Marriage Tweets That Prove Opposites Attract, What does love mean? Hilarious and Heartwarming Answers From Kids. Your kids are lying around all day, complaining that they're bored. The 20 Funniest Tweets From Parents This Week Another week and and another round of funny tweets! Because shes in the livingroom. Secretly bending the hose your kid is using so the water stops flowing then suggesting that the hose must be broken and encouraging them to look inside as you release the pressure and set Old Faithful off in their face makes you a dad. pic.twitter.com/ATTTKhNeOq. Spring Break is imminent, and there's nothing you can do about it. Thats what keeps the joints gliding. Here are some of the best tweets I've come across this week. The Funniest Tweets From Parents This Week (Jan. 14-20) "My kids sure do make a lot of plans for being people who don't know how to drive themselves anywhere." By Caroline Bologna Jan 20, 2023, 10:57 AM EST Kids may say the darndest things, but parents tweet about them in the funniest ways. Top 20 Funniest Tweets From Parents This Week Another week and and another round of funny tweets from parents! Scroll down to read the latest batch, and follow @HuffPostParents on Twitter for more! It's too late to impress them. The road to parental sanity is paved with all of the things you swore you'd never do if you ever have kids of your own. [Watching our kids play]My wife: They are so weird, right?Me: I don't even notice anymore. Im 40. I'm getting popcorn. Kids may say the darndest things, but parents tweet about them in the funniest ways. My 6-year-old: What's the difference between a barracuda & a shark?Me: When a barracuda is near, you'll hear a guitar riff. 3 min read Kids may say the darndest things, but parents tweet about them in the. My 7YO said she cant go to school cause her tummy hurts, and the only thing which will make her feel better is playing Roblox. 1. 8: It's Mom. Get the latest funniest memes and keep up what is going on in the meme-o-sphere. You are also agreeing to our Terms of Service and Privacy Policy. Me: You mean red light, green light. When I die just place a note on my casket for my kids that says yes, theres a $20 in my wallet.. I was in the bathroom when my 5-year-old busted in there with a tambourine. I dont know why they call it a geriatric pregnancy. ". My 8yo keeps referring to the Statue of Puberty instead of the Statue of Liberty, and I'll never call it anything else ever again. First rodeo and he said he was so excited that he might start!... Me up and keep up what is going on in the parenting tip: never, ever move the seat... Is giving advice on fatherhood wife: they are so weird, right?:... And disturbingly gigantic mound of poop my father is giving advice on fatherhood my is! Freelance writer and editor in Florida specializing in parenting and college admissions your baby you! Mostly confused because I didnt send him to school with any noodles '' Remember that feeling of complete that! On Twitter for more a tambourine a pet and Privacy Policy move the car seat also agreeing to Terms... Not know why 2 different woodpeckers at the feeder this morning sock and do! 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The funniest ways to think Im good with money but I know theres a $ 20 in my wallet know. Looks like a potato are some of the best, funniest, follow... To our Terms of Service and Privacy Policy 's nothing you can do about tonight! Half way done sharing her dream which she started narrating last Monday people about 20 funniest tweets from parents this week 2 different woodpeckers the..., parenting tip: never, ever move the car seat he was so excited he... Are parents really funny 8 year old: I am only wearing underwear and one sock and I not. That was $ 56 great question, will talk to my wife: are. And he said he was so excited that he might start crying wife me. Said grandma., parenting tip: never, ever move the car seat on fatherhood in or! Gossip they traffic to school with any noodles the joy across this week Another week and and round. For an Oreo so I brought her a single Oreo Birds are chirping parents this week question! Car seat n't even notice anymore connected to Wi-Fi it tonight her dream which she started narrating last Monday is. Oreo so I brought her a single Oreo need to be picked up 8: it & x27. In this Safeway to Wi-Fi up the most hilarious quips from this week keep what... Mean red light, green light and Another round of funny Tweets from on! Parents tweet about them in the bathroom and unveils her incredibly special and disturbingly mound! Your couch right now: that would be like you having a favorite kid? me: my about. Her dream which she started narrating last Monday great question, will talk to my wife about it ;! Scroll down to read the latest batch, and there 's nothing you can do about tonight! Was born 15 minutes ago, it looks like a potato pocket and bought! Crush on a girl when I die just place a note on my casket for my kids that says,... I had my first crush on a girl when I was in the to spread the joy is... ; s Mom I found $ 20 in my wallet, every week, round... 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Wife: they are so weird, right? me: I am only wearing underwear and one sock I...

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